Adventures in Dressmaking

Greetings all ^-^

Today I am going to share with you the rollercoaster ride of rushed dressmaking!  This is a cautionary tale, which will hopefully dissuade you from the dreaded foreshadowing of the phrase:

"I'm sure it'll turn out fine anyway"

Or any variation thereof.

I dreamt up this dress many months ago when I found some beautiful navy polkadot fabric at my local haberdashery in Plymouth.  If you ever have the misfortune to find yourself in Plymouth, check out their newly expanded premises on the high street near Armada Way.  They are brilliant; I am going to miss them so much!  But anyway, this fabric was such a wonderful print and weight, I instantly decided I wanted to make a 1950's style dress from it.

I waited for months, the idea developing and the dress morphing from a simple dress with sweet-heart neckline, halter, and circle skirt to one with a boned bodice, gathers, and excessive trimmings.  This is always a problem with my brain: it runs off by itself and comes back with all these infeasible ideas.  Like a cat hunting a mouse getting distracted by trying to take on a giant pigeon.

Once I finished my degree a month or so ago, I needed something to distract me from the boredom of the much-anticipated "time-off".  A rather foreign concept to me, and one I tend to struggle with.  What is this "sitting still"?  If I am awake I should be doing something!   Although, sit me in front of a Fallout game and I will play for hours, because that's kind of like doing something... it just happens to be your character doing the running around, not you.  Anyway, once I'd worn my Fallout character "Sneezles" out, I finally got started on this imagined dress.

I had been looking out for a pattern close to what I was going for, to help me.  But again, like the overambitious kitty, I decided:

"No! I shall make my OWN pattern!"

Now, don't get me wrong, I did ok at first.  I just did the pattern for the bodice because I could fit each part on a piece of baking paper (I had left my pattern paper, purchased specifically for this purpose, at home.  Like a numpty).  I made the base out of calico, and held it around ma body.  For some reason, my maths was apparently terrible and the thing had ended up being about 2 sizes bigger than my torso.  I really should have altered it at this stage... but no.  

"It's fine!  I'll pull these bits at the back together 

to cover the zip with a laced back!"

To be honest, it was an interesting idea.  But I'm getting ahead of myself, I haven't even told you about the skirt, yet!  Ah, the skirt.  This is where I fell down.  The circle skirt idea and become slightly more complex and morphed into a gathered, draping back part with a shorter, more fitted front panel.  Probably would have worked better if I'd made a pattern.  As it was, I just measured ma booty and did some maths.  Remember how good I am at maths?  Well, yep. That happened again.  

By this time, I'd been working on this dress properly for a couple of days, and I was excited because the bodice was "done" (I even PRESSED it!!  You know you're proud of me!), and it was all coming together.  Or so I thought.  I stupidly got really into what I was doing and forgot to eat lunch.  I don't know about you, but hypoglycaemic-Lozzita is NOT fun, and NOT very productive. Hypo-Lozzita likes to rush things and enjoys the phrase:

"We can FINISH this if we just KEEP GOING!"

Yes, hypoglycaemic-Lozzita also enjoys using the Royal "we".  She's quirky like that.

So, I pressed on, battling the (literal) kittens for the thread, and doing sloppy maths.  In all honesty, if I'd had my dressmakers mannequin or access to a full-length mirror (or, you know, one that doesn't stop at my boobs) I'm sure I could have seen the troubles before they occurred and I got sad.

I finally sewed all the pieces together, gathering at the back and darting at the front.  I tried it on.  Had there been a mirror, I would have cried.  Baggy and shapeless.  I mean there is BONING!  For gods's sake!  You would have thought that would give some shape.  But Nooooo!  Without my mannequin I couldn't see where things needed tucking in, and at this point I was VERY hungry.  So I did what any sane person would do:  I drank coffee.  And continued.

I pulled the bodice in at the back and added some eyelets through which to thread the corset cord I had left over from the last one I made.  Have you ever tried to insert eyelets?  With a hammer?  And a tiiiiny mould?  No?  Well, let me destroy the mystery for you: there is a lot of hitting yourself with a hammer, and very little placing of eyelets.

In the end, I used the jewellery pliers I had bought for the spoons.  Now I have ten deformed eyelets.   Not having to tools you need is just The Best!

But anyway, I laced it up, zipped myself in... and it fell down.  Then I cried.  As usual, I had tried super hard at something, gotten carried away, and fucked it up.  Classic Lozzita.  I was grumpy all night and the boyf had to deal with that joy.  He fed me Chinese food.  Good boyf is good.  However, I did still spend the night lying awake thinking about how to fix the dress and wishing I had a mannequin, a mirror, or a boyf with an hourglass figure so I could use him as a model/mannequin (he just doesn't have the boobies or hips to fit the 1950's style.  Damn svelte boyf with his sexy man-figure).  

So, yes.  The morale of the story is:

"Always have lunch"

Or perhaps:

"I need a fucking mannequin if I'm going to make adequate clothing!!"

But maybe it's just:

"Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck EVERYTHING!!!"

I don't know.  Perhaps we'll leave that to the philosophers.  

But I don't want to leave on a negative note, no matter how very grumpy I made myself.  I spent some time today cinching various pieces of the dress in until it looked like a dress that could fit my figure, and with a couple more seams and gathers, I think I've got a purdy new dress! 

So I guess the morale of the story is:

"Even if everything goes to shit, you can 

always sew more or use a seam ripper.  And if it's still shit, there's always fire"

On that note:

Live long and prosper ^-^

Nom nom nom Etsy Top Ten

Greetings all ^-^

Welcome to this weeks Etsy Top Ten, featuring the most delicious, nommy foodstuffs I could find on Etsy.  If you like reading GoT, then you'll love this list.  We don't have the debauchery and incest, but we do have the food obsession.  If you weren't hungry before, you will be when you finish reading this!

Enjoy ^-^


1. Raspberry & White Chocolate Pancake Mix sold by LittlePancakeCo

This cute little bag contains 4 servings of delicious raspberry & white chocolate american-style pancake mix.  The shop is adorable, and they have five different flavours that all look amazing!  And you can feel good about eating them because for every packet sold, LittePancakeCo will donate a hot meal to someone who really needs it ^-^ So go forth and nom nom nom your way to pancakey happiness ^-^





















2. Chocolate Covered Strawberries sold by Lushleys

This seller has many items that had me drooling over my keyboard, but these were the best of the lot for me!  Freeze-dried strawberries covered in milk and white chocolate, nom nom nom!!
















3. Much Ado About Nothing Gourmet Rub sold by LifeOfSpice

I enjoy both the name of this gourmet rub, and the spices included in it.  This is an authentic adobo seasoning blend (well done if you understood those words... I don't, but it sounds good) which is apparently awesome when used as a rub on meats or in chilli's and fajitas.
It contains Sea Salt, Paprika, Pepper, Chipotle Powder, Oregano, Cumin, Onion, Garlic, Demerara Sugar and Rice Flour.  These are generally all good things!  If spice isn't your thing, check out the sellers other items; they have loads of different flavours for you to try out in your home cooking!




















4. Molecular Gastronomy Spherification Kit sold by SandyLeafFarm

I'm still not sure what this is!!  But I do want to try it.  Apparently it is very fancy cooking-ness, and it looks like awesome food-science fun!  It is also vegetarian, which is always nice ^-^  The flavouring is left up to you, but the kit will let you know how to do the fancy stuff.

The seller has many other kits as well, if you feel like doing some different food-science!



















5. Chocolate Fish & Chips sold by CreightonsChocolate

This amuses me way more than it should.  I would actually feel better eating this than a portion of fish & chips.  Mainly because nom nom nom nom!!  It's a really cute idea, and the seller has loads of other interesting novelty chocolate items to check out too ^-^


















6. Black Crystal Lava Salt sold by ZeeCeeBoutique

This is an interesting one.  It is an apothecary jar filled with Icelandic Lava Salt.  Apparently produced using only energy from geothermal hot springs in the northwest of Iceland.  The best thing about it is that it is a Volcano Salt... how awesome does that sound?!  I'm very intrigued ^-^






















7.  Raw Food Snack sold by happybodyfood

I'm not sure if these are along the same lines as the Naked bars you can get (yes, that's a brand, no, it's not food porn), but these look delicious.  There is no chocolate in them, but they still taste of chocolately-orangey goodness.  Definitely worth a try ^-^


















8. Valentines Day Kit - Cookie Mix sold by JessicaBakesWell

This isn't actually the first JessicaBakesWell item I initially chose for this list.  I was originally seduced by the dark Belgian chocolate & Raspberry cookie mix, but on looking through the shop I found this adorable little Valentines kit.  I'm not really a Valentines person, but the idea of this made me happy ^-^  It even comes in gluten-free form for those with rebellious digestive systems.  I definitely recommend having a browse through all the different cookie mixes because they all sound delicious.  And I love the fact they all come in little jars!  It's all just so cute and delicious!  ^-^
















9. Vegan Dark Chocolate With Cranberries sold by Ethicoco

100% organic, and 100% vegan.  This chocolate bar only contains cocoa, unrefined cane sugar, and cranberries.  A real treat for those who love their chocolate, and care about their impact on the planet & its inhabitants. ^-^ (Also, nom nom nom nom)























10. Peanut Butter Fudge sold by Marmalady

OM NOMNOMNOM!! This is pretty much the best idea for fudge ever.   Overly bad for you, but delicious enough so that I really don't care!  Sorry everyone with nut allergies.  But don't despair!  The seller has many other items that look just as good, like this vegan chocolate cake!  Nom, nom, nom :)

I Moustache You A Question Etsy Top Ten

Greetings all ^-^

This weeks Etsy Top Ten is a little bit random: moustaches!  Over the past few years, the bushy moustache has made quite the comeback.  It's everywhere... except people's faces.  Don't get me wrong, I love it.  I'm still not tired of the puns or the design.  I know some people have had enough & think it's an over-used design that's run it's course and should be retired to the realms of "remember when that was a thing?".  These are the people I am hoping to win round with this Etsy top ten.

There are some awesome things on Etsy, and these are some of the coolest, unique uses of the moustache icon that I could find!  Enjoy ^-^



1. No Nonsense Beard Oil sold by GaiaCreams

Being unable to grow a beard, I don't know the joys of beard oil, but if you do require some, this is probably a good choice ^-^  It's organic, vegan-friendly, with ethically sourced ingredients.  It will apparently moisturise and condition your luscious facial locks whilst soothing and rehydrating your skin.  I think most gents would be happy with that!  So give it a go :)

















2.  Felt Kawaii Taco Plush sold by feltpastel

I'm not sure why this is a thing, but I'm so glad it is!  You can now own your very own sentient taco ^-^ ... sentient may be an over-statement, but they are adorable and they do have a moustache ^-^
















3.  Lumberjack Beard Wax sold by BaldyBeardy

Again, as I am unable to grow facial hair, I have never purchased beard balm.  I am assuming it is along the lines of beard oil.  This stuff is made by a man with a big bushy beard, so you have to trust that he knows what's best for beards!  I also chose this because it is called Lumberjack Beard Wax, and that's ok.
















4.  Moustache Teacup & Saucer sold by PookiePouch

I would enjoy drinking large amounts of coffee from this mug whilst raising one eyebrow quizzically at anyone who happened to be watching.  This is what I am reduced to as a non-bearded person!!
















5.  Warm & Spicy Beard Oil sold by MerryBandArtwork

More beard oil!! Gents, your beards will be so oiled!  Apparently this one will keep your beard fresh, sofy, and shiny.  Who wouldn't want that??  This is vegan-friendly, and is 100% natural.  It promotes beard growth, and is very, very manly.  Enjoy!


















6. Moustache Print Skirt sold by Interrobangirl

I love the fact that the seller has hand-printed the moustache pattern onto the material.  It gives the item it's own unique feel.  A great item for everyday wear ^-^






















7.  Giant Moustache Pillow sold by MadeByMinah

It's a giant, squishy moustache... what's not to love?!  It's so very awesome and I want one!  It's made with felt and non-allergenic soft polyester fibre filling.  It would make a brilliant addition to any living room ^-^






















8. Moustache Top Hat Ring sold by Secondchance2012

These rings are awesome ^-^  Such a cool idea and really well made.  The seller also donates to Movember when any of their moustache-related items sell in November, so keep a look out :)























9.  Moustache Cookie Cutter sold by CandyCupcakeShop

This amuses me more than it should.  I want moustache biscuits!!  They would be so much fun!  Who doesn't want an edible moustache??  Not-fun people, that's who.





















10.  The Mo Tie 006 sold by Spicetag

You need this in your life & in your wardrobe.  There are many different styles of Mo-Tie, so you can find the one that suits you best!  For those with moustaches already, just think of the awesomeness of having TWO moustaches at once!!
























Ritzy Pick
Moustache Trimmer sold by LondonCutlers

At £72.00, this is a very fancy moustache trimmer.  It has a retro sterling silver handle, up-cycled from cutlery and joined with a new Merkur double edge razor.  The handle is hallmarked for Sheffield, England 1906.  The razor comes with a pack of 10 blades to keep your whiskers trimmed to perfection for a long time to come ^-^

Excessively Cute and Cuddly Etsy Top Ten

Greetings all ^-^

Welcome to the first Etsy Top Ten of the new year!  As I adore cute and cuddly things, this seemed a good place as any to start.  I must warn you: some of these items are ridiculously cute and may send you into a cute-fit, or even a cute-gasm.  I hold no responsibility for this.

As usual, all the items featured here are from sellers based in the UK, and are all geeky/nerdy in some  awesome and unusual way.  Enjoy! ^-^


1. Gothic Rabbit Plushie sold by thetinyteaparty

This rabbit is far too cute for it's own good.  It is adorable in it's gothic little way.  It even has a little bow on it's tail!!  Apparently her name is Ester and is made from super-soft minky, with some little rhinestones on her eyes.  I love the little ruffle around her neck.  If gothic isn't your style, there are many more.  Including this amazing glow in the dark one!  It;s just so cute!!!












2. Creepy & Cute Zombie Monkey sold by ThehouseofBoo

From the cute, to the creepy.  This little guy is a zombie monkey, as you can tell from his necrotic features.  He is, however, still lovely and cute.  He is made from soft fleece, and is even CE certified.

(The CE certification issue only came to my attention a few days ago, and I still don't know an awful lot about it - just that if you're selling soft toys in the EU, it's the law that they must be CE certified so buyers know the materials are safe... So kind of a big deal.  It also costs quite a lot to get things CE certified!)

Anyway, this is an awesome item, and very well made. An excellent addition to out top ten list this week ^-^











3. Nosferatu Soft Plush sold by eejitstoys

Isn't he just the cutest little vampire?  D'aaawwww!  He is far too adorable for a horror movie monster, but that is what the seller is aiming for with her Movie Monster Series, and I think it is awesome!

I love the detail around his eyes and the little buttons on his coat.  An adorable, well made little guy ^-^











4. Placebo "Pill-O" sold by TreacleTownTreasures

These are adorable, and also a pun!!  I love these little pillows so very much!  They're made from re-purposed fluffy hats, and it's eyes are small black buttons.

Such an awesome idea, and far too cute!! ^-^













5.  Toothless Pillow Plush sold by BirdOfManyColours

Toothless, the Nightfury dragon from How To Train Your Dragon, is already an adorable character.  So having him in squishy pillow form is just awesome!

Also, if you look at him from the front, he looks amazingly derp, which is even cuter! Love it ^-^











6.  Cute Cthulhu Crochet sold by WickedKittyCrafts

This little guy is just lovely.  He comes in a few different sizes (small, medium, large), and is made from wool and toy filling.  You can choose a different colour if you would like to have a more groovy Cthulhu.  What Eldergod wouldn't want to look fabulous??

















7. Chemistry Plush sold by MyWifeYourWife

A really cool idea, and I love the different materials denoting the different substances in the various glassware.  So very awesome!  Not necessarily "cute", but they are cuddly pillows, and geeky, and SCIENCE!!  Who doesn't want to hug science?!












8. Spock Cat Plush sold by WhisperOfThePit

I love how evil Kitty Spock looks!  It's like he's trying to intimidate you, but doesn't realise he's tiny!  It's adorable!!  He's only 18cm tall & wide, so don't worry if you are intimidated by his evil mastermind stare.  He doesn't have fingers, so the Vulcan neck pinch is out of the question.











9. Pikmin Rock Flower Crochet sold by Chikai

This little guy is just the cutest!  I'm a big Pikmin fan, although I haven't had a chance to play the most recent one properly.  Pikmin are adorable in the first place, and this crochet doll does justice to their cuteness.
The seller has many other awesome and cute items for sale, including a pokeball and a unicorn.  So if you like this, you're probably going to want to check the shop out ^-^









10. Rainbow Dinosaur Plush sold by LottiesCreations

I wouldn't be able to decide!  These guys are all so cute! They even have their own names!! The Brontosaurus is called Boris, and I think he might be my favourite, but Stanley the Stegosaurus and Trevor the T-Rex aren't far behind!!

Oh, and I know it's not a cute plush, but check out this hat from the same seller. It. Is. Amazing.











Ritzy Pick
Custom Dragon Fox Plush Doll sold by Magweno

For £130, you could have your very own, custom made dragon fox.  You can customise pretty much every part of these cuddly little characters so it's uniquely yours.  The seller has even included a chart to show you where each different material will go on the finished dragon fox, so you won't get confused when ordering it exactly how you would like it ^-^

The crafting that goes into these guys is just astounding, and can be made in about 2 weeks.  As another plus, they are all vegan friendly ^-^  Just another reason to get yourself a dragon fox!

Unicorn Etsy Top Ten

Greetings all ^-^

This week is all about unicorns.  Because unicorns.

Enjoy ^-^



1. Unicorn Hood sold by TrafficCone

Have you ever wanted to be a unicorn? Of course you have!  Well now you can!  Let your dreams of prancing around living a care-free, magical existence be (partially) fulfilled by this awesome hood.  It even has attached mittens, and rainbow lining! And tassels!!  So awesome!!















2. Magical Unicorn Wedges sold by NixxiRose

Puuuuuuurrrrdy.  These shoes (like all of Nixxi Rose's designs - see my other top tens for some examples ^-^) are amazing! With these, you are one step closer (see what I did there?) to living your unicorn dream.  Love them!



















3. Florahawk Mohawk Headdress sold by PenduloudThreadsUK

Do you like unicorns, but just can't bring yourself to become a sparkly, colourful, rainbow-loving individual?  Do you prefer to keep things more in line with your outlook of humanity?  Then this is perfect for you!  A Unicorn, "florahawk" mohawk headdress.  Just the name of it sounds awesome.  Go! Live your gothic unicorn dream!













4. Handmade Unicorn Poop sold by TG02014

Ever wondered what unicorn poop looks like?  Or smells like?  Apparently it smells awesome, and can be used as soap.  I am so very curious about this. More curious than I have ever been about poop.  Made with vegan-friendly oils, this item makes me a lot happier than poop should. Love it.















5. Handmade Silver Unicorn Necklace sold by OberonJewellery

You may have noticed that if you type "unicorn" into Etsy's search bar, there are many, many, many results.   Most of which are very similar.  This one, however, really stood out to me.  I love the contrast of the gold horn on the silver, and the detail is just wonderful.  A really beautiful design, and exceptionally well made.  And the photos are so cool!

















6. Unicorn Relics Chest sold by RealmsOfFae

This is a really lovely idea.  The chest contains a unicorn horn, unicorn shadow, and unicorn mane.  And the magical properties of these relics are enclosed in a small scroll tied with a silver unicorn charm.  A wonderful little gift for any unicorn fan ^-^



















7.  Rocking Unicorn sold by HomeGardenBench

I wish I was five again.  This wooden rocking chair unicorn is a lovely idea.  The horn is soft and detachable, so no children will be spearing themselves on it. Very pretty and well made ^-^

















8. Rainbow Unicorn Wraparound Ring sold by TheVulpeculiar

It's so cute!! You may not have noticed, but I love anything cute (and fluffy.  But this is not fluffy.  The cute makes up for it).   This is a really simple, but wonderfully bright piece of jewellery.  It is made to your ring size, so no sadness on receiving it and it not fitting.  It just looks so peaceful and content.  I envy that unicorn...















9. Unicorn Wire Headgear sold by JoshKard

Are regular unicorn horns not fancy enough for you?  Would you prefer to be a special, upper-class unicorn?  Then this is the item for you.  Be a fancy unicorn!  You'll instantly feel better about life ^-^





















10. Twinkle Unicorn Ring sold by MONVATOOLondon

This is a very pretty ring.  I featured it's dragon counterpart in my Dragon Etsy Top Ten a while ago, but I think I like this one even more!  It's sparkly, it's a unicorn, it's well made, and can be adjusted to your ring size.  It's awesome.



















Ritzy Pick(s)
I couldn't decide between these two awesome items this week, so I'm featuring both ^-^

Unicorn Heels sold by AshantiLou

More shoes!!! Yes, I did already feature some unicorn heels, but these also needed bringing to your attention. For £290, these awesome heels designed by Ashanti Lou could be yours!  I'm not sure I could walk in them, but more practised individuals would be able to.  I envy those people!

















Baroque Latex Bodysuit sold by Eustratia

This is a really amazing piece.  For £120, this gorgeous latex body suit could be yours.  You may ask how this relates to unicorns.  No, unicorns are not renowned for their love of latex bodysuits.  There are unicorns on the front of the suit.  And I just love the cut of the item.  It's really different, and feminine.  Wonderful ^-^

Batman Etsy Top Ten

Greetings all ^_^

Welcome to this weeks Etsy Top Ten.  There are some awesome items here, so have a look & maybe you'll find an xmas present for that Batman-crazed friend you have, or just for you.  I've tried to find the most interesting and different Batman-themed items, because there are so many out there and personally, I like things that are a little bit different to the norm.

Enjoy ^-^

1. Batman Hat sold by beautifwool

Love this awesome little crochet hat ^-^ The little bat ears on the top are my favourite part, as well as the little tassels.

















2. Batman Tubetastic Pimps sold by Tubetasticpimp

This is something I've never come across before, but it is such a brilliant idea!  These little things are accessories for hearing aids or cochlear implants, and the seller has loads of different designs.  I love the batmobile one best ^-^
















3. Riddler Bag sold by QuirkyBoo

Such a quirky, awesome bag!  Made from cotton and decorated with a lovely bow and a great little Riddler lego figure, this is a great nod to batman fans.  I especially like the design of the fabric, with the question mark made of bats ^-^
















4. Batman Key Rack sold by 2D23D

A really cool idea, and practical too.  Sadly, since I found this item, it has actually sold.  But the seller has many other awesome Batman-related items on their Etsy page, so go check them out ^_^














5.  Keepsake Box sold by KatesComicCraft

I love this little box ^-^ Really well made and beautifully hand-painted, this keepsake box is perfect for keeping all those important little bits and pieces safe.  It even comes with a key lock so you know your things are secure ^-^













6. Batman Necklace sold by rachemstar

There are lots of Batman necklaces around Etsy, but this one really stands out.  It's such a cool design, and wonderfully different and quirky.  Love it ^-^

















7. DC Comic Oragami Bouquet sold by PaperBouquetsco

This really is something special.  Made by a paper and origami artist, using pages from DC comics, this is a wonderfully unique item.  The seller can create many different styles of bouquets, with your choice of theme, be it DC, Marvel, love letters, photos, or anything else you can think of.  This is a really lovely idea, and beautifully made.

















8. Batman Sleep Mask sold by lemonyjen

This is rather awesome.  Why just go to sleep, when you can go to sleep as Batman??  I especially love the little bow on the side ^-^ Very cute, and also practical.  Love it.















9.  Silicone Batman Mould sold by PickleLillys

This is really awesome ^-^ Now you can make cakes in the shape of batman's face.  Who wouldn't want that??  Also jelly.  Because nom.















10. Batman Reusable Sanitary Pad sold by lunalandingscouk

I didn't even know these existed until today.  You might initially think "ew, gross" but think about how much you spend on sanitary towels/tampons in a lifetime?  And it still galls me how we have to pay tax on those things!  This is a good alternative if you're not happy using the Mooncup-style reusable lady products.  Also much more environmentally friendly than single-use sanitary products.  And you get to have batman in your pants. Just sayin'...

















Ritzy Pick
Batman Art Deco Vintage Chest Of Drawers sold by smithersofstamford

For £385, this wonderful chest of drawers could be yours to make your home that little bit more special. Decorated with vintage comics from around the 1970's, this would make a great addition to any comic nerd's batcave, or wherever you prefer to be all brooding and secretive.